Heavenly Conversations, Part 1 June 20, 2011

Last night when it was time for bed, I sandwiched myself between my two oldest little guys as they were settling down. Our nightly routine is to brush teeth, read books, say prayers, and then I softly rub their backs and feet, and we whisper our last thoughts of the day together as they drift off to La-La Land. My hope as a parent is that these moments together help them relax and lead them into a peaceful night of sleep and pleasant dreams. It’s a sweet experience for me to be able to bond with them by hearing their thoughts, and I also get to tell them one more time that I love them before the day is gone forever.

So there we were last night in their room, lights out, their heads hitting the pillows. My oldest, who is 6, was pretty tired and was fading fast, while his younger brother, who is 4, was primed to talk for hours. I gently reminded Mr. Chatterbox that it was time to wind down, and he resisted, but after a little nudging, he settled down.

It got quiet for a few seconds. Then he softly said, “Mommy, when we’re in Heaven, I’ll still love you.”

“I’ll love you, too,” I whispered back, smiling in the dark and feeling deeply grateful for that moment.

My oldest also chimed in, “Me, too.”

“I’ll love you, too,” I replied.

Sometimes, Heaven truly is a place on Earth.

Grant Me My Wish, O’ Ball of Cotton! June 12, 2011

It seems that spring has finally settled in Washington, albeit about two-and-a-half months late…Hello, Mother Nature?!

Little tufts of cotton have been prevalent in the air this past week, and in certain areas around the city, the cotton has collected in force on the ground, giving it a look of fuzzy snow in the way it has dotted streets and parking lots in little clusters.

I hadn’t thought much about these little strands of white floating by, other than blaming them for an occasional itch in my nose. Then, the other morning, my little man and I were walking toward the door of his preschool, when he saw a cotton wisp riding a wave of air right in front of him. He got a most delighted look on his face as he stopped in his tracks to reach for it. His chocolate-brown eyes grew wide and bright, and in a giddy voice, he squealed, “MAGIC FAIRIES!! LOOK, MOMMY!! IT’S A MAGIC FAIRY!!!” He reached his hand forward to catch this magical little cotton clump, letting it alight on his index finger for a few seconds before the breeze carried it away on an enchanted journey.

Simultaneously, I stopped with him, trying to zone in on what he was talking about, and then felt an indescribable joy wash over me — that feeling you get when you get a glimpse into the creative spirit of a child. In that moment, my mind raced to fill in the gaps – where did he learn this concept of floating cotton as magic fairies, and what wishes had the magic fairies already granted him? And could I make some wishes, too? Because I could use a few little wishes coming true in my life. Earlier that morning, I had been feeling the weight of being a single mom and providing for my family as I was getting myself and the boys ready to go. (It was one of those quietly-cry-when-nobody-is-looking-but-brush-away-the-tears-quickly-because-you-don’t-want-to-look-like-Rudolph-by-the-time-you-get-to-work mornings.)

In that moment with my little boy, the burdens of the day were lifted from my shoulders, and life was put back into a sweet focus. It was a moment when everything suddenly seemed right in the world…there was peace — the kind of peace that can only come from childlike imagination.

“Wow! A Magic Fairy?!” I giggled as I asked him what wish the Magic Fairy was going to grant him today.

I was so grateful that he pointed out these magic fairies to me. And that he was full of sheer delight over something so simple.

Thank you, Wonderful Child of Mine, for putting an otherwise annoying, sneeze-invoking part of spring into a much more exciting perspective…what an endearing way to sprinkle some pixie dust kind of happiness on the day.

And thank you, Magic Fairies, for taking flight around us.